Friday, February 6, 2009


Eternity is such a giant concept for most of us to really comprehend. I was reading some other blogs today as well as an entry on our family website that has me thinking. I have been thinking about heaven. My thoughts use to be of white fluffy clouds, and sunshine all the time. But then came that day 25 years ago that changed heaven from some place abstract to some place very real. It became a place I HAVE to go and not just a place that would be nice to go to someday when I die. I now had two of the most important people in my life there. And Michael was only seven when he died so he will be in the Celestial Kingdom because he didn't reach the age of accountability. Growing up I put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect in every way. Knowing that if I wasn't I wouldn't be with Michael and Dad forever. Almost to the point of driving myself crazy. Let's face it this is an impossible task without an understanding of the Atonement. Once I learned and gained a testimony about the sacrifice of Jesus Christ and what it means in my life things got easier. I am not alone in this quest for perfection and whenever I screw up He is there to pick up the pieces and set me straight again.  I write this because people we love die everyday whether we have known it was coming or it is sudden, tragic accident. I won't know why Dad and Michael were taken back to heaven when they were until I am able to see the work they are doing in heaven. In the mean time I can pray for comfort to know that this was God's will. He needed them in heaven more than I needed them here on earth. At times when I get mad, and I still do get mad, or I miss them, I pray again for the comfort I have felt many, many times and put my trust back in Christ's loving hands. 
Today I am thankful for my family. For a mom who continued to take us to church, made me go to seminary and got up early to drive me there, worked hard, and prayed harder. She is the most incredible person in my world and there is a special place in heaven waiting for her!!! I have the two most amazing kids. They teach me everyday not to sweat the small stuff. And words cannot describe my wonderful husband. He looks at me crazy when I cry for no reason and holds me until I am done. He works so hard so that I don't have to. He is my rock here on earth and I am lucky to have him with me for eternity. 


The Pea said...

Great post!! I love you!

Mike and Julie said...

That was so amazing. Thanks for posting.

A Sharing Heart said...

Thanks for sharing you thoughts, they are beautiful. They brought back wonderful times we had with your dad and Michael. They are one of the reasons so many of us are working so hard to return home. I shed tears that day not only for that dear sweet woman who lost her husband but all over again for you mom and each of you. You do receive extra blessings for the trials this has brought into your life, Our Savior knows you by name and loves you and blesses for that great loss. Love you